A Passive-Aggressive Post

It's said, that if you look for trouble, you usually find it.

It is true indeed. I wish I'd never looked. I wish I'd never seen it, so that I wouldn't now be wondering why it was there, what happened to it, and why it's gone.

I know the winds have shifted. Call it female intuition, call it paranoia, call it whatever you want . . . but it's actually frightening how often my gut instincts have been right in this past year. I know right now that something is different, and I'm pretty sure I know what's changed.

I could be hurt, I guess. I could over-react and act like a psycho about it. I could get enraged and catty and lash out. I could change my plans, I could sit and cry, I could simply disappear.

I could do a lot of things.

But again, I turn to music to find my solace . . . George Michael:

But I gotta think twice before I give my heart away
And I know all the games you play, because I play them, too
Oh but I need some time off from that emotion
Time to pick my heart up off the floor
When that love comes down without devotion
Well it takes a strong man, baby, but I'll showin' you the door
Because I gotta have faith . . .

I will not be angry at the breaking of rules I myself have broken, because I view hypocrisy as possibly the worst character trait a human can possess. I know what I've done, and yes, part of it is regrettable, but most of it isn't. I will not hold others to standards I cannot meet myself. Therefore, I will be rational, because to get angry would only mean others have the right to get angry with me.

This one will have to just go away.